"I feel like a hobo." ~Eric Armijo

And then Landon bursts in the dressing room and says, "I don't mean to be a diva, but LOOK AT THIS!"

"You can't even see my moustache because I'm blond and white!" ~Brittni Mardis

"What is that?"

"It's an onion ring."

"But it doesn't have a hole in it."

"That's because it's an onion hole."

Brittni Mardis, Darren Robinson, and Camille Chappel

"Are you horendously hot?" ~Brittni Mardis

"I am so sparkly right now. It's offending me!" ~Brittni Mardis

"I'm gonna go find my hat and change my pants." ~Mr. Arave

"I wish our entire lives were in slow motion." ~Sam Bolli

"On a scale of one to burrito, how good is pizza?" ~Darren Robinson

"How dare them!"

"Where do they get so many munchkins?!" ~Kiki

"It's not the problem. It's the way it's dealt with."

"Don't stand like a teenager, because teenagers aren't people." ~The Arave

"Let me ask Mrs. Stocks to tinkle up here." ~Mrs. Tawa, talking about lightly playing high notes on the piano

"Will you play a song for me while I lay on the piano like this?" ~Katie Lee

"I'm not coordinated until three o'clock."

"If you're not doing it prayerfully, you're not doing it properly." ~Speaker in an Enoch ward